SYTYCD Week 1

So there we go again, new stage, all flashy an we're introducing the top 20.
Oh dear, Cat just told us that the judges will cut two people today instead of the audience… Meh.
There will be a new dancer tonight, poor little Billy Bell (stupid name) was replaced by this guy named Brandon because Mr. Billy Bell (still stupid) has mono.
Whenever I hear Channing my heart cries (stupid AND not a name). Oh well, check out miss Karen, in her bra and shit.
Is it just me or what? Every time Cat says ‘for real’ I get reminded of the Twitch/Joshua era.
Why is Shankers a permanent judge? WHY? And WHY do we WANT Paula Abdul on here? Ha, Nigel, Paula Abdul WAS at dancing with the stars a while back, burn sytycd, BURN.
Nigel says that Billy Bell needs to get ‘bedder’, I thought Brits where supposed to be good at pronouncing their T's.
Oh Noelle is not dancing *is not sad about this* Awwww Melanie is dancing again, I missed herrrr.
Hmmm. My favorites better don’t get stuck with people that I hate..

Channing and Phillip, hmmm, interesting… a Jive, well Phillip will be good. The Tappers will rock at the fast ballroom dances. They was the shortest intro ever, just about 20 seconds longer than what they used to do in season 1.
What is up with this song? They’re good at the flicks but I’m not getting the Jive feel too much, I think this choreography is meh (but yay for loads of flicks in there! We don’t have that that often.) I’m not really feeling these two as a couple, yet.
Mary said ‘not bad’ and called them lazy (with the flicks). And they're lacking chemistry, Nigel said it, YES, I called that.

Ashleigh and Jakob-
Ashleigh is gross and nobody knows who Jakob is. They’re doing a bit of Tasty Oreo choreography.
Errr, Ashleigh, I don’t want to know ANYTHING about you and your husband (whom I call Fern)
I like this music! Oh this was veryyyy cute, I liked it.
As long as Ashleigh keeps her tongue in her mouth (or just keeps her mouth shut for the rest of her journey in this show) I may start digging her. Jakob the most gifted? Then pray tell why I’ve never seen this boy before. Even Billy Bell got a ‘waaaaaah’ moment with Adam randomly crying over him (we never got to see enough to the dance to see why Shankers was crying, but sureeee, I’ll take it). And why can’t the hiphop/b-boy crew ever be gifted, Nigel? And Nigel basically just said that Ashleigh couldn’t get herself into the finals.

Ariana and Peter are dancing hiphop (heep hop)
Isn’t Ariana the cutest little muffin ever? Peter is an Italian…interesting. Hiphop, intriguing.
I think their chemistry will be fine, heehee, they’re cute. Someone is laughing at them and they haven’t even started yet, probably mocking their costumes. They’re jirating! This was cute. Adam just imitated Lil C, hmmmm, not so buck. Oh deary, the judges did not like it too much. But they’re so cuteeeeeeee.

NOOOOOOO not NOELLE and Russell, WHY WHYYY. Love Russell, do not love Noelle.
A Foxtrot! How classy!! I love the Foxtrot.
Noelle is very blasphemous ‘for all I know it could be imitating a fox’ don’t even GO there, woman.
Oh Melanie <3
This music <3
Russell <3
I hope Noelle stays injured and Russell gets paired up with someone less annoying. (/mean)
Oh wait, there was the G-word for a krumper, BUT it came from Adam, not Nigel.
*applause for Russell*

Beeanker (Bianca) and Victor.
Victor is like seven shades of gay. They’re doing a contemporary routine by Mr. Travis Wall.
Bianca has LONG limbs. Oh this is epic.
Dude she just thrust her lady bits into his man parts!
Travis seemed to like it, which is good. The judges where mixed.

Karen and Kevin, I like this!
The cha-cha-cha! Well Karen will rock at this for sure!
Oh I like this! And they did the pretzel move at the end! ‘How gorgeous are you two’ I KNOW right!
Adam Shankman was watching the GIRL. Oh wait he just said it himself. Mary is screaming…again, which is good but damn. *is deaf*

Ellenore and Fern (Ryan). They are dancing a contemporary Jazz routine by SONYA.
She’s talking about creatures(is not getting the story but I’ll take it).
Thank you Sonya, I now have a new song to add to my list (Sonya fills up my list, I love her taste is music).
This was very interesting and very Sonya, but different.
Adam loved it. Fern is so creepy... Ellenore is touching him in a weird spot, watch out for Ashleighs tongue Ellenore! Nigel at one point thought Ellenore was Ferns turkey (huh?).

Pauline and Brandon (Billy Bell’s replacement.)
Oh Brandon is a hiphop dancer? I had no idea. Who is this Jason choreographer person!?
A Smooth Waltz…hmmmm
Whitney Houston!? Cheesyyyy
Oh they have some nice moves in there. Adam looks like he’s going to cry.
And I find it amazing that Brandon has only been in for a day and a half.
Nigel didn’t like it much; the others thought it was alright.

Kathryn and Legacy are the next couple up, they look like they’re cave people.
Kathryn kind of looks like Nora-Jane Noone from 'The Magdalene Sisters' Am I crazy? If I am please say so.
They’re doing hiphop. Oh this is cute! Haha
Cat just said 'Eve O'lution' not Evolution 'Eve O'lution' WHAT?
Andddddd I’m deaf again.

Nathan and Mollee. Disco inspired by Mexican wrestling? What?
Poor Nathan, Mollee hit him in the man parts with her head. (flashback to Lacey and Danny 'Oh my gosh, my head hit Danny’s goodies!')
It’s a bit frantic…even for Disco.
Adam liked it. They all did, actually.

This show had a CRAZY amount of jirating.

Bottom 4, Ariana, Brandon, Pauline and Russell. HELLO, MY HEART IS BREAKING.
I like all of these people. And they put two hip hoppers in there, too, asswipes.
Wait? Brandon did hiphop? Slow hiphop? What?
Awww Ariana is out. I liked both of the girls though.
The boys now…hmpf. Brandon is out *phew* (whattt? I like Russell)
I like how they just used Brandon as a filler for this season (have I called them asswipes yet?) but at least they're letting him into next season, maybe.

I have to say that I enjoyed Kathryn and Legacy the most this episode.